So, a little BG: I have absolutely nothing against my MIL. I think she's great. She annoys me at times, but who doesn't? lol. Anyway, I do not have any issues/grudges held against her for anything. We just aren't super close, and I really don't have any plans to be. It's just not ever been on the forefront of my mind.
So, a little bit a go she calls my DH to talk for over an hour about me. She said she feels like I don't want her to see our children and that I clearly don't like her because I didn't text her one time to check up on her (more on that later). Let me start by saying, I cannot count the number of times we have asked her to babysit or watch the kids for a night so that we could have some alone time and she has said no! She's busy, or whatever, so we move on and find something to do with the kids. NBD. She has offered to watch them for date nights, only to tell us that she can't watch them but for more than an hour or 2, and we live a half hour away as is, so it ends up not being worth the drive time and we will decline politely. Somehow...this has turned into ME not wanting her to see our kids ever. Oh, and we never invite her over...so there's that. I also never invite my family over, yet they will call me up and make plans to come visit when they're free one weekend with no problem (that's how my family operates), but somehow this means that I'm making them more of a priority than DH's family...ok. I don't get it.
And for the one time I didn't check in...she got sick on a holiday and didn't show up for the family festivities going on. Her husband told us she wasn't feeling well, so we all said "oh, ok" and went about our business. None of us knew it was anything more than just being exhausted or maybe a stomach bug. Anyway, my DH and I are the only ones who didn't text her to see how she was doing, and it hurt her feelings. I don't even text my mom for stuff like that (just not my personality)...so I'm not sure why she expected me to. Maybe she expected him to, but even so, she's projecting all of the hurt from that situation onto me. And because of that one time, I must not like her or care about her wellbeing.
Anyway...so my DH asked me to call her up and ask if we could talk about things. I asked why? I don't have an issue with her. And if she has one with me, which according to what she told him she clearly does, then she needs to come to me about it. But she flat out refused to do so. And even at our DD's bday party, she literally stayed outside the whole time and wouldn't talk to me. I didn't really care since it was DD's day, so she got all the attention from everyone else who didn't feel the need to stay outside all day and away from her. But anyway...what would you do? Is it really my responsibility to reach out over something that I only heard through a third party? Shouldn't the one with the problem be the one to reach out?
