I have read the sticky and been lurking on DWIL for a couple of years now.
Background: In August 2014 we found out that my dad was having an affair after 33 years of marriage to my mom. He had been seeing the woman for about a year and my mom found out by accident. I have two younger sisters, and we were all devastated. We all looked up to my dad and my family was very close. I've come to realize we were enmeshed pretty badly and have worked at putting a stop to that on my end. The divorce has been very ugly and let's just say that I can never see either of my parents in the same way ever again. Also, the divorce is not finalzed and I am pretty sure that my dad lives with his mistress at least part time. I can give more info if necessary; I'm not sure if it's relevant.
I have two children and my dad usually sends a package or card for holidays, birthdays, and sometimes randomly. He always lets me know to expect something in the mail. When this started in 2014, my children received packages from my dad, and the addresses were not written in his handwriting. I knew that his mistress wrote the addresses and made it clear to my father that that was unacceptable. He knows that she is not even dead to me; she is a non-entity. She does not exist. I have never met her and never will. She will never be a part of my children's lives. My children have received many uneventful cards and packages since then.
Today, my children received Easter cards. The address on the card was in my dad's handwriting, but the messages inside the cards were written by the woman. I was so furious I began physically shaking. I put them back in the envelopes and taped them up. My children will not receive them and I plan on sending them back.
So, should I just send them back and BH? TO and BH? TO with a text? My son's birthday is Saturday, and I am sure he will call or text. He will probably ask for pictures, but he won't be getting any.
Also, how do I return the cards? Write refused or return to sender?
There is background with him pulling something similar (but way worse) on my sister if it's relevant.
Thanks for the help!
