I posted on here a few times a year ago plus. My mom has depression, agoraphobia, victim complex etc. Very toxic and I'd been her only help/support for years and years. My dh and her have always butted heads. You ladies helped me see how toxic stuff was so I've bh'd her a while and retrained etc and now have a decent relationship w her. Until tonight. My parents are divorced for 5 years now. He has a serious gf, living together. Never met her and dad invited us to his bday dinner tonight, w her family. Wasn't psyched to go but went.
My dad was a terrible husband. Yet my mom was so mentally ill it took a toll on him. But a really bad guy to her and not a great dad. Did drugs w my sister when she was in teens. Swore/yelled all the time at mom. Really verbally sbusive. But he paid every bill and never walked away from all financial obligation. He's trying hard to be innhis kids life these days and is easy to get along w, is happy and just wants peace. None of my siblings or I are particularly fond of him but we love him cause he's our dad. M We all know my moms crazy and are all closer w her. So tonight when I got home from the dinner I get this:
"If your father were somewhat a normal person I would feel fine with you going out to eat. that is not the case here.
He has destroyed my daughters life
He has destroyed mine while for 15 years i have been bearing the brunt of her agony
he has stolen my financial future when for 30 years i protected our future while bringing up 4 children on nothing. it took such a toll on me. yet in 8 years he stole everything from me.
he has abused your sister and me.
however you still have such loyalty to him and none to me. this injustice will stop in my life.
he is having a wonderful financially safe and happy life and i have nothing but abuse from your sisters sickness from what he has done to her when she was 16
i can take no more hurt.
yes so you have a father what ever that means and a new mother but you don't have me. know you wont care but i cant live the little life i have left watching this nightmare. with all the evil he has done he loses nothing has loyalty from my children which i will never understand and has a wonderful life. i hope you enjoy it with them.
good bye i just cant take this injustice and hurt anymore.
i wish you nothing but happiness and my heart and love and thoughts will always be with the kids.
i have adored you since you breathed your first breath but there is no loyalty here and love is loyalty. can you imagine me going out to eat with anyone who has hurt you? you know it wouldn't happen because my love is pure and honorable. i will not live with my children knowing who this guy really is and playing with him and your new mother
goodbye this has gone too far.
week from tuesday is cancelled if you want to see your aunt call her and make a date. will not attend your daughters birthday have your new mother come with the guy nor can i have a party for your husband. have a wonderfully happy life enjoy every day God blesses you with.
it is so like you not to have the caring to call me on the way home. you knew i was hurt and also concerned if your sister drank there while driving home alone. how could you be so cold. i deserve so much better and if i cant have it i will remove myself. no one will ever love you as i have it just didn't catch on. good bye".
It's sheer craziness and I shouldn't be upset but I'm so upset! Help!!!!
My dad was a terrible husband. Yet my mom was so mentally ill it took a toll on him. But a really bad guy to her and not a great dad. Did drugs w my sister when she was in teens. Swore/yelled all the time at mom. Really verbally sbusive. But he paid every bill and never walked away from all financial obligation. He's trying hard to be innhis kids life these days and is easy to get along w, is happy and just wants peace. None of my siblings or I are particularly fond of him but we love him cause he's our dad. M We all know my moms crazy and are all closer w her. So tonight when I got home from the dinner I get this:
"If your father were somewhat a normal person I would feel fine with you going out to eat. that is not the case here.
He has destroyed my daughters life
He has destroyed mine while for 15 years i have been bearing the brunt of her agony
he has stolen my financial future when for 30 years i protected our future while bringing up 4 children on nothing. it took such a toll on me. yet in 8 years he stole everything from me.
he has abused your sister and me.
however you still have such loyalty to him and none to me. this injustice will stop in my life.
he is having a wonderful financially safe and happy life and i have nothing but abuse from your sisters sickness from what he has done to her when she was 16
i can take no more hurt.
yes so you have a father what ever that means and a new mother but you don't have me. know you wont care but i cant live the little life i have left watching this nightmare. with all the evil he has done he loses nothing has loyalty from my children which i will never understand and has a wonderful life. i hope you enjoy it with them.
good bye i just cant take this injustice and hurt anymore.
i wish you nothing but happiness and my heart and love and thoughts will always be with the kids.
i have adored you since you breathed your first breath but there is no loyalty here and love is loyalty. can you imagine me going out to eat with anyone who has hurt you? you know it wouldn't happen because my love is pure and honorable. i will not live with my children knowing who this guy really is and playing with him and your new mother
goodbye this has gone too far.
week from tuesday is cancelled if you want to see your aunt call her and make a date. will not attend your daughters birthday have your new mother come with the guy nor can i have a party for your husband. have a wonderfully happy life enjoy every day God blesses you with.
it is so like you not to have the caring to call me on the way home. you knew i was hurt and also concerned if your sister drank there while driving home alone. how could you be so cold. i deserve so much better and if i cant have it i will remove myself. no one will ever love you as i have it just didn't catch on. good bye".
It's sheer craziness and I shouldn't be upset but I'm so upset! Help!!!!