We have a little one due in the spring and we are about to find out the baby's sex. I'm wondering what people's opinions are on whether or not we should announce the sex and the birth to TO family members (DH's parents). Should I just leave it up to DH if he tells his parents? Should I mention it?
If we don't tell them, they will find out; I am FB friends with DH's extended family, and we don't care if they tell information to ILs. A small part of me feels like we should be the ones telling them about the birth. I also feel SO bad for my DH. I will have family celebrating, and DH will have nobody 😥. I know the relationship with his family makes him sad. I suggested him reading books and blogs, or even going back to therapy, but he doesn't want to because he doesn't think it's a big deal.
As a very, very small background as to why they are in TO: it all started over a year ago after the birth of our son ( 1.5 years ago). We haven't seen ILs in over a year. Most recently, we asked ILs to close a college account in DS's name due to MIL extreme manipulative behavior. We would only have a relationship if they closed it. Months later, they closed it but made it clear they "couldn't see the value in a relationship". Months later they texted us and DH asked them not to. They back-peddled and put the blame on DH for misinterpreting the text: "I simply was wondering what the relationship would look like since you view us so poorly".
DH called him to tell them that we were pregnant between the time we asked them to close the account and when they did (they closed the account about a month after we told them we were pregnant). He felt like even though we were in a really bad spot, he should still be the one to tell them.
I have background on here for more noms.
If we don't tell them, they will find out; I am FB friends with DH's extended family, and we don't care if they tell information to ILs. A small part of me feels like we should be the ones telling them about the birth. I also feel SO bad for my DH. I will have family celebrating, and DH will have nobody 😥. I know the relationship with his family makes him sad. I suggested him reading books and blogs, or even going back to therapy, but he doesn't want to because he doesn't think it's a big deal.
As a very, very small background as to why they are in TO: it all started over a year ago after the birth of our son ( 1.5 years ago). We haven't seen ILs in over a year. Most recently, we asked ILs to close a college account in DS's name due to MIL extreme manipulative behavior. We would only have a relationship if they closed it. Months later, they closed it but made it clear they "couldn't see the value in a relationship". Months later they texted us and DH asked them not to. They back-peddled and put the blame on DH for misinterpreting the text: "I simply was wondering what the relationship would look like since you view us so poorly".
DH called him to tell them that we were pregnant between the time we asked them to close the account and when they did (they closed the account about a month after we told them we were pregnant). He felt like even though we were in a really bad spot, he should still be the one to tell them.
I have background on here for more noms.