I'm going to *try* & keep this short & sweet. I wish I would have posted last night while everything was super fresh, but oh well.
I'm 37 weeks pregnant with number two (well..today I'm 36w4d..rounding). December 1st (when I'll be 37 weeks), my husband & I are going to a play. We have a 21 month old little girl.
I had already asked my mother when we bought the tickets in October if her & my dad could watch her. They said of course. Now, we knew I'd be about to pop when play time came around, so we want everything to go smoothly. I asked if they could just come to our house to watch LO instead of messing up her schedule & having her spend the night at their house. We'd be home by like 10:30pm anyway, so I'd like to her to be home.
My mom was like, "Can't she just spend the night?" I told her no, we'd rather have y'all just watch her at our house. I would be less stressed knowing she's at home doing her own thing. LO has only spent the night over there one other time when she was about 12 months. We could *probably* let her spend the night more, but my husband & I are a little ovc-«protective..whatever..ANYWAYS -
So she gets all mad & says that we can find someone else to watch her (even though I know she doesn't mean it). I tell her that's fine, & I ask my brother & his girlfriend if they could watch her. They say yes. This is all back in October.
I'm sorry this is getting long. Almost done, I swear.
Yesterday, we have our 3D sonogram, & we invite my parents to go. My dad went to the last one, so we figured why not. They ask if we want to get dinner at this pricey little Mexican restaurant. Sure, I guess we can swing it..because I'm super pregnant & those nachos sound sooooo good.
So we're eating & talking & whatnot. I thought to myself, "Oh, good time to bring up the play night's plans." Since it *is* in four days.
Me: "So we were thinking y'all could be at the house at around 4pm on Tuesday?"
Mother: "I thought we decided she was spending the night at our house?"
Me: "Um..no. We would rather have y'all watch her at our house."
Mother: "No, I thought we decided she was staying with us."
Me: "No, I decided y'all would watch her at our house, so y'all could keep on watching her when you want to."
That pissed her off BIG TIME. She started asking how I could be so rude. I turned to my husband & was like, "Was that rude?" He said, "No, you were just asserting yourself."
ALL HELL BREAKS LOOSE NOW.
She gets her mad face on & looks at my husband & starts saying, "Kiss my ASS. KISS MY ASS!" (Everything is kind of a blur now in my head, but I'll try to remember all that she said.) "We have done so much for y'all, & you just treat us like shit! Grandparents are just as important.. (she was going to say as parents, but she didn't because I stopped her). "We have to be so careful around you so we don't say anythhing wrong. We just want to spend time with you & LO! All I've done is love you & LO & you treat us like shit!"
I don't treat them like shit. I've learned from DWIL how to set boundaries & how "no" is a complete sentence, & she doesn't like that very much. Oh, well.
So I try telling her, "She's our daughter & we decide how things go with her. It's not a give & take or a compromise with y'all. We set the rules."
But every time I got out, "She's our daughter," my mother would say, "I NEVER SAID SHE WASN'T!"
Right. I know that. Let me get my fucking sentence out. I finally did, & she was seething mad..sitting there trying to eat her food. It's all really awkward. She starts yelling (at the booth) again about how she only loves us & wants to spend time with us. Then, she decides she too pissed to eat, tells my dad to get their food to go, & she storms out.
All because we want our daughter to be watched at our house. I asked my dad to try & talk to her, but he was like, "You know she won't listen."
She's never blown up like this before. She's been mad at our boundaries, but she got over it.
Oh, & she also added in her tantrum how she thinks my husband is always whispering things & thoughts in my ear. Um..no. We're a team..he doesn't tell me how to act or what to say, but him saying, "No, you just asserted yourself," pissed her off so much, so finally told how she was feeling.
She always says stuff like that..how my DH is putting thoughts in my head..or that I act too much like him..or I've been "hangin' around him" too long.
ANYWAYS - they left. I cried a little because pregnant. She's never acted that way..it was so weird. I was embarrrased for her.
My brother says he'll watch LO on Tuesday no problem.
That was last night. Today she sent me a text a couple of hours ago. I think I attached the message.
I don't know what to say. I don't know when to respond. I know she still feels how she feels, & I know she want to see LO. I just want her to finally stop fucking arguing with me, & do what I say when it comes to my LOs. She always does what I say in the end, but it's always back & forth, blah blah blah, because I said so kind of thing. It's exhausting.
Please help me, DWIL. She went a little BSC, & I don't want to see it again.
Thank you! :)
Sorry for typos..it's dinner time, so I'm going to go eat now. ;)
