I typed up background but it got super long. Basically, my mom is my BEC (death by a thousand paper cuts, really) and I am working on building my spine to tell her when things don't work for me. I have no real reason to suspect she'll react negatively, but am super anxious nonetheless.
She lives a few hours away and has been visiting monthly since LO was born 10 months ago, staying either with DH and I (which I will be putting a stop to) or my sister. This weekend she is staying with my sister and we all met for lunch yesterday.
Everything she did annoyed me (because BEC), but there were two things I think are actual stomps: not asking to hold LO, just taking her, and feeding her without asking (we were having sandwiches and she gave LO pieces of crust, which I had also been giving LO beforehand). I did tell her to stop feeding LO after a few minutes but I JADEd. I debated not addressing it but I keep thinking about it, so I was hoping to get email help. As I said, I've never really shut her down before and I'm really nervous.
Here's what I have so far:
"Hi!
(General pleasantries, info about something she had asked about at lunch)
There were also some things that happened yesterday that I wanted to address. At lunch, you came over and took LO out of the highchair without asking. In the future, we will let you know when you can hold her. You also started feeding her without asking, and we prefer to be the only ones to feed her for the time being.
Thanks for understanding."
Thoughts?
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Help with email to mom? UD 2, 5, 6, 8, 10, new issue 12, 13
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