Sorry this might be long and pretty all over the place. There are so many things to include in this I don't really know where to start.
We've been on LC with FMIL and were planning to slow fade because her behavior lately has been horrendous....until this past week. We had family come in town and they were staying with FMIL. In her typical fashion their vacation was made all about her with tons of gate keeping making it very hard for us to see everyone without interacting with her as well.
We've been having lots of issues with her that stem from her drinking. One of the on going issues has been her trying to watch our oldest daughter. We've obviously come to conclusion that it's unsafe and she won't be spending time with her at all this summer. Well DF attended a dinner at MOO place so he could spend sometime with his other family and was getting frustrated with his MOO so he decided to drop the bomb that she's not spending any time with ODD this summer. I don't think it was the best time to tell her but I wasn't there & I mean his mom his problem anyways right? Well MIL seemingly took the news graciously. But as soon as he left she started bad mouthing me to any family that would listen.
We hosted dinner the next night as I like any time with MIL to be on my territory so it's easier to handle. She arrived 3 hours late and in that time we were informed off everything she was saying about me. It was all very specific information so we know it was all true. She finally arrived.. Crying... And it was all downhill from there. We had an incident where she literally snuck upstairs to "rescue" my YDD and DF had to make her leave.
Our family has finally headed back home so we're going to be on ELC with her but with all that has happened and her need to fill other people in on her feelings towards me I'm thinking we'll need to CO pretty soon.
So my question is do we tell her we're going to CO? I don't think she's going to accept our ELC slow fade because she really wants to paint me as being a bad guy and a slow fade won't give her all the sympathy that she wants.
We've been on LC with FMIL and were planning to slow fade because her behavior lately has been horrendous....until this past week. We had family come in town and they were staying with FMIL. In her typical fashion their vacation was made all about her with tons of gate keeping making it very hard for us to see everyone without interacting with her as well.
We've been having lots of issues with her that stem from her drinking. One of the on going issues has been her trying to watch our oldest daughter. We've obviously come to conclusion that it's unsafe and she won't be spending time with her at all this summer. Well DF attended a dinner at MOO place so he could spend sometime with his other family and was getting frustrated with his MOO so he decided to drop the bomb that she's not spending any time with ODD this summer. I don't think it was the best time to tell her but I wasn't there & I mean his mom his problem anyways right? Well MIL seemingly took the news graciously. But as soon as he left she started bad mouthing me to any family that would listen.
We hosted dinner the next night as I like any time with MIL to be on my territory so it's easier to handle. She arrived 3 hours late and in that time we were informed off everything she was saying about me. It was all very specific information so we know it was all true. She finally arrived.. Crying... And it was all downhill from there. We had an incident where she literally snuck upstairs to "rescue" my YDD and DF had to make her leave.
Our family has finally headed back home so we're going to be on ELC with her but with all that has happened and her need to fill other people in on her feelings towards me I'm thinking we'll need to CO pretty soon.
So my question is do we tell her we're going to CO? I don't think she's going to accept our ELC slow fade because she really wants to paint me as being a bad guy and a slow fade won't give her all the sympathy that she wants.