Long time lurker, first time poster.
My DH and I have 3 kids, the youngest of whom was born in 2012. It was around then that one of my friends gently steered me towards DWIL, after I had a near- nervous breakdown over trying to meet everyone's holiday expectations. A lightbulb went off.
We have three sets of parents (my parents are divorced and remarried, his are still married). They all live within a few hours drive. They all have unrealistic expectations and seem to perceive us as "kids" despite the fact that we have jobs, own our home, and pay our own bills.
Since 2012, we have been setting boundaries. This has been met with resistance - at first good natured condescending eye-rolling, then irritation, then anger, then acceptance in some ways but not all. Which leads me to the dogs.
We are all "dog" people. All 3 sets of parents have dogs. We have 1 dog. When we visit other people, we leave our dog at home. When we go on long visits or trips, we arrange for a dog sitter. Pretty normal stuff for both sides of our family. For some reason, one set of parents keeps trying to bring their dogs to our house when they visit. Their dogs are nice, but we simply do not allow other pets in our home (these are NOT service animals). We have many reasons for this - our dog doesn't get along with them, one of them is poorly housebroken - but none of that really matters because we said no. They keep trying to force the dogs on us. Telling me that I can just put my dog outside, or that their dogs suffer in a kennel. They tried to tell me they can't afford a kennel which I frankly didn't believe because they are extremely wealthy with multiple homes and luxury vehicles. Even if it was true, the option is not to bring the dogs to my house. We can visit somewhere else (ex. Their house or a park halfway between). Also, they don't do this to other people. They have no problem kenneling their dogs or hiring a dog sitter when they go on their frequent vacations (which is none of my business except to point out that this behavior seems targeted to us).
What is this all about? Are we being overly stubborn? Should I let them bring the dogs if they leave them in the yard or something?
My DH and I have 3 kids, the youngest of whom was born in 2012. It was around then that one of my friends gently steered me towards DWIL, after I had a near- nervous breakdown over trying to meet everyone's holiday expectations. A lightbulb went off.
We have three sets of parents (my parents are divorced and remarried, his are still married). They all live within a few hours drive. They all have unrealistic expectations and seem to perceive us as "kids" despite the fact that we have jobs, own our home, and pay our own bills.
Since 2012, we have been setting boundaries. This has been met with resistance - at first good natured condescending eye-rolling, then irritation, then anger, then acceptance in some ways but not all. Which leads me to the dogs.
We are all "dog" people. All 3 sets of parents have dogs. We have 1 dog. When we visit other people, we leave our dog at home. When we go on long visits or trips, we arrange for a dog sitter. Pretty normal stuff for both sides of our family. For some reason, one set of parents keeps trying to bring their dogs to our house when they visit. Their dogs are nice, but we simply do not allow other pets in our home (these are NOT service animals). We have many reasons for this - our dog doesn't get along with them, one of them is poorly housebroken - but none of that really matters because we said no. They keep trying to force the dogs on us. Telling me that I can just put my dog outside, or that their dogs suffer in a kennel. They tried to tell me they can't afford a kennel which I frankly didn't believe because they are extremely wealthy with multiple homes and luxury vehicles. Even if it was true, the option is not to bring the dogs to my house. We can visit somewhere else (ex. Their house or a park halfway between). Also, they don't do this to other people. They have no problem kenneling their dogs or hiring a dog sitter when they go on their frequent vacations (which is none of my business except to point out that this behavior seems targeted to us).
What is this all about? Are we being overly stubborn? Should I let them bring the dogs if they leave them in the yard or something?
