Ooooook so this one is...... bizarre.
This has been unfolding for years, but it's become increasingly apparent over time that my SIL has a little thing for my DH, at least on some level. BG here is that DH is 29, I'm 26- we are 6'3'' and 5'5'' respectively. BIL and his wife, now SIL, are both 25 and about the same height of 6'0''. DH quite a bit more "fit" than BIL, has a more trim frame and is classically attractive, but they do share a lot of traits in terms of appearance- local people frequently confuse them for each other. SIL is blonde, blue-eyed, and in good shape, but any attractiveness is quickly overshadowed by her BSC and frequent need to be loud and generally disgusting. I'm average in most ways, brunette, and I'd say 8 years ago, pre-fertility treatments and the accompanying weight gain, I'd have been considered reasonably attractive.
When SIL was just BIL's GF, she would make a lot of comments that were awkward for everyone... examples:
Since she's taller than I am, we should "just switch brothers, haha" (um, no.)
It's a shame I met DH before she had a chance to meet him. (we were engaged when she started dating BIL.)
She hopes I appreciate that I "got the more romantic brother" (yeah, I married someone I like....?)
She laments that she's stuck with "the fat one" (there have been many variations- she frequently comments on BIL's weight in a derogatory way, because she's a bitch)
She generally refers to DH as the taller/better looking/more successful/nicer/more attentive/better dresser/etc brother. You get the idea.
I've pointed this out to DH a few times and he just rolls his eyes because a) he absolutely hates this girl, she's his BEC big time. and b) he's awkwardly modest and doesn't even know he's attractive, so he gets really uncomfortable with anyone calling attention to his appearance.
a little more BG- this SIL is already on ELC, because she's crazy, and we just generally don't care for her. BIL is awesome, and he's great with DD and we love letting them play when the opportunity presents itself, maybe once a month or so, but they have never and will never watch DD alone. In fact, even though he's the only married sibling either of us has, they also do not have guardianship rights in our will. BIL is a good guy, he just happened to be a late bloomer and married his first girlfriend. He and DH aren't super close, not much in common, but they haven't had any problems either. SIL is due with their first in two weeks, and it's a girl, so they have both suddenly taken more of an interest in DD in the last few months- but again, we keep contact minimal and basically only see them incidentally while seeing PILs.
on to the true noms.
SIL and I work for the same corporation and there's an IM program. She frequently messages me random things. Her favorite thing is to treat me like google with her pregnancy. I go with, "not sure, ask your doctor." or "don't remember, try google" or, most frequently, BH.
The newest set of awkward comments center on her obsession with stating that everything DD does, is "JUST like BIL!" umm, that's funny, I don't remember having sex with BIL........? So if DD cries because SIL gets in her face at MIL's birthday dinner, it's "oh she's so rotten, just like BIL." or if she's squealing loudly at a toy, "oh she's really wild and loud, just like BIL" get the idea?
Today she took it a step further.
"you know, OP, I'm just really hoping that since DD is JUST like BIL, maybe that means my DD will have..." (I shit you not, she said this) "...DH's great qualities."
cue me vomiting at my desk. ok not really. but a little, in my mouth.
WTELF.
So great, SIL, thanks for coming right out with it and confirming that you live in a fantasy world where you married your husband's brother and are having his baby. Could she be any more transparent about being obsessed with this idea that she actually married my DH instead of her own??
bitches be crazy.