So this might a little rambly, I apologize in advance. It's my first time posting about my mother so there's no BG.
I'm looking for words of wisdom on how to make it through this situation with an intact nervous system.
I'm in my home town caring for my mother who was diagnosed with lung cancer at the end of April. I came here then, when she was diagnosed, stayed three weeks, then went back home for two weeks, then came back here to stay the entire month of June, roughly five weeks.
The problem is that she's basically working against me. More than with the disease I am dealing with her constant critiquing and "tantruming".
Ex - the other day she had chemo. We spent NINE hours in the hospital. She was in the room with the nurses and patients while I waited outside on a bench (again, nine hours). When I went in to pick her up and leave, she was talking calmly with the nurses who all complemented her for the positive attitude and character blah blah blah. Then as soon as she crosses the threshold with me she turns into a fucking nightmare.
She goes INTO the bathroom, grabs a bucket and pees in said bucket on the couch.
I was speechless.
She did it on purpose to spite me.
She was IN the bathroom! Why couldn't she sit on the damn toilet in front of her????
This is every day and I have lost all compassion, unfortunately.
I'm being brought back to when I was a tween/teen and she would attach lists of idiotic "rules" on every door in the house that I was supposed to follow to a tee (which I didn't, because who has time for that).
Anyway, I'm on a tight schedule and must run but will be back to elaborate. I'm sorry if this is probably not enough information for you to get the picture. I'll be back and explain better.
I guess my question is, if you have found yourself in a similar situation, what approach did you decide to take in order to make the best of it? I've never missed home so badly as I do now.
I'm looking for words of wisdom on how to make it through this situation with an intact nervous system.
I'm in my home town caring for my mother who was diagnosed with lung cancer at the end of April. I came here then, when she was diagnosed, stayed three weeks, then went back home for two weeks, then came back here to stay the entire month of June, roughly five weeks.
The problem is that she's basically working against me. More than with the disease I am dealing with her constant critiquing and "tantruming".
Ex - the other day she had chemo. We spent NINE hours in the hospital. She was in the room with the nurses and patients while I waited outside on a bench (again, nine hours). When I went in to pick her up and leave, she was talking calmly with the nurses who all complemented her for the positive attitude and character blah blah blah. Then as soon as she crosses the threshold with me she turns into a fucking nightmare.
She goes INTO the bathroom, grabs a bucket and pees in said bucket on the couch.
I was speechless.
She did it on purpose to spite me.
She was IN the bathroom! Why couldn't she sit on the damn toilet in front of her????
This is every day and I have lost all compassion, unfortunately.
I'm being brought back to when I was a tween/teen and she would attach lists of idiotic "rules" on every door in the house that I was supposed to follow to a tee (which I didn't, because who has time for that).
Anyway, I'm on a tight schedule and must run but will be back to elaborate. I'm sorry if this is probably not enough information for you to get the picture. I'll be back and explain better.
I guess my question is, if you have found yourself in a similar situation, what approach did you decide to take in order to make the best of it? I've never missed home so badly as I do now.
