My DH and I have a 22-month-old DS and a 13-day-old DD. We have been separated for a little over 3 weeks due to my DH's verbal abuse towards me (never our kids). He grew up in a family where that sort of behavior was modelled for him and considered acceptable, but I won't raise my children in an unhealthy environment. We are in counseling, separately and together, and working to create a safe and healthy family for ourselves and our kids. I refuse to move back in with him until I (and our counselor) feel that we have the tools to do that. We (mostly my DH) have made some good progress, but we aren't there yet, so the kids and I are staying with my mom for the time being. I did allow DH to be my support person while I was in labor, and his parents came to the hospital to see their new granddaughter after she was born. They didn't mention the separation at all and were perfectly nice and polite to me, no matter what their private opinions may be on the situation. His sister, however, is so angry with me for "breaking up the family" that she has refused to acknowledge her new niece in any way. She didn't come to the hospital, she didn't respond to my DH's text about her being born, she didn't even "like" my FB post announcing her birth, and she's an active FB user. I know this should be the least of my worries right now, but I feel like it's revealed to me the kind of person she is. It's not even like she's ever been a caring or protective older sister to DH. She told him this past weekend that she will come see the baby when/if we move back in with him. At this point, that is still a month away, and that's IF everything goes perfectly in terms of counseling and behavior changes. I won't tell her she can't see the kids, but I don't plan to be there, and I really don't want anything to do with her going forward. This could be the postpartum hormones talking, but I think she's behaving terribly and I don't want her to be a part of my life. Do you think I'm overreacting because I just had a baby, or is it reasonable to keep my distance from her indefinitely?
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