I am the reason SO family doesn't have a relationship with our LO. Long story short, according to them I refuse to take LO to their house and I want to keep LO away because I'm an evil DIL/SIL. Mind you FIL and MIL only came by 3 times to our home to see LO as newborn. LO will be a year soon. SO is deployed coming home next month. MIL has been saying that once he is home they can finally see their grandchild. Oh hell no. They are partially right. I refuse to take my child on a 45 minute one way drive to their house. FIL is an alcoholic, he is off work for an injury and is home drinking all day with his buddies. In the last few month his drinking has got so out of hand no one on his family's side or MIL show up to any of their functions nor does he get invited. SIL, BIL and their DD live with them, so MIL and FIL thought that with out LO they would have convenient access and say in our parenting. I have not allowed it. I don't want my LO exposed to an alcoholic who thinks he's King and will belittle others. SIL and BIL are unemployed they depend on them for housing, food, money so even if they don't like being told what to do with their kid and FIL parading her with his drunk friends they say nothing. I would never allow it. Ever. SIL made a remark about how I am purposely keeping my LO away and how her child misses her cousin so much! What? They've seen LO once. She also goes around asking others if I bring my LO to their home and acts shocked that I don't go over to their house. I know this info through a family member who warned me recently she is not your friend she is in competition with you in her mind be careful. FIL drinking has got out of hand in the last 2 years I've witnessed his outbursts and will not be a part of it. So all this to say that MIL and SIL (my SO brothers wife ) have been telling SO that once he's home they look forward to seeing our LO regularly. He's been gone for the greater part of a year and really doesn't have a sense as to how these people have made no effort on their part but feel wronged and entitled to our LO. I don't go into deep detail and drama when I speak to SO he doesn't need the additional stress while deployed. I can lay it out in further detail once he's home. I did however, tell him that he will not be taking LO over there without my consent, he said fine. SO is a softy with his mom I don't want him to feel sorry for them and cave to their demands. MIL is an alright person, she just has allowed their father to walk all over her and this is why SO feels bad for her, she is his mother I get it, but that doesn't have anything to do with my LO. I need advice opinions how to deal with this situation.
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