So my son with autism is seeing occupational therapists, regular therapist, and he saw the Lead Teacher for the county because of all the problems he has been having at school and home. Its a lot of big issues. So without getting into all of them up front I can clarify later if need be to try to keep OP short.
All three of the above professionals blamed inlaws and extended family for some of this. They ask as part of the evaluations and questions about support network and family support and extended family. I tell the truth or how I see the truth to them that our family does not support us enough and give examples. They all three agreed and said the same thing to me, that most of their clients have more help with special needs kids from extended family than we have and that they don't believe extended family is doing enough or should be doing more.
So is that bad advice? Are they wrong to say that? I know you guys advocate grandparents don't have to help but that is not what the professionals are saying. They are not really saying I can make ex family change but they all seem to agree they should be doing more.
So how do I handle this? I told my mom already what was said each time and she knows I feel she could do more. I have told MIL quite nastily as I hate her what was said and that they said she should do more. DH sticks his head in the sand and won't agree that MIL should be doing more and ignores what three seperate professionals told me. He definitely won't even mention to MIL she is lacking.
So how do I deal with this? Just accept it as I kinda have to do that. But what else should be done? Should we cut off family that refuses to help or help more? Should we continue to tell them therapists are putting some blame on them for our family crisis that we don't have a proper support network we need? Should I get new therapists? Should I ignore what they say?
Its really getting to me that what I have said all along about us not being supported is being confirmed by all these professionals.
